Sent to us by WCapps:
The Wake-Up Call of Kermithulhu
You round the corner of the cliff wall bordering the beach, and nearly stumble into a huge group of dancing frog-lobster guys. Fortunately, you manage to duck behind an outcropping before they notice you.
They’re dancing around a guy — a regular guy, not a frog-lobster guy — in a black hooded robe, who stands facing the ocean with his arms raised. He shouts “Ia Kermithulhu! Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Kermithulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn! Fhtagn katamari damashi’i!” You hear a rumble of thunder in the distance as the dancers shout “Iaglurblurlurhurlglururb!”
“Oh Great Green One, hear my summons!” shouts the man. “The stars are in alignment! Rise from your watery slumber!” The ground begins to shake ominously as he throws his head back and shrieks “Rise! The time of awakening is at hand!”
A gargantuan tentacle, dripping with slime and horror, rises lazily from the ocean depths and slams down on the robed man with the accuracy of a 9-to-5er slapping the snooze bar, smashing him flat and scattering the frog-lobster guys in a panic.
A deep, phlegm-laden voice rumbles, not in your ears, but directly in your brain:
GIMME FIVE MORE EONS.
All in all, it’s a mind-expanding experience.
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